top of page

Finding Strength in Your Differences

Writer's picture: carlamorton4carlamorton4

Before you married, did you recognize, like and or acknowledge the differences between you and your now husband?  I was cleaning out a closet and I came across some of our engagement items. I found this article that the local paper had written about us (the paper had a section on engaged couples). It showed us outside the tennis court, and it said “Couples diverse personalities temper while dating.”  It made me laugh out loud. Are you kidding me? We didn’t temper anything while we were dating. But boy did I get the full effect of the “diverse” personalities once we married. 

 

            Many times, what drew us to our mate is the opposite phenomenon. We find the extreme differences interesting, appealing, and attractive. Many times, because our spouse has strengths that are not ours, many times they actually are the complement to our weaknesses. The challenge is that after we get married, we may decide that those strengths of our spouse are really not strengths, they are irritations in our life. They do not match our strengths. They are not as good as our strengths. We can begin to see their strengths, not as a strength but as a weakness, a true deficit. 

 

            I hate to admit I lived in this place of a distorted sense of my strengths being superior to his. I became blinded to thinking that his strengths were deficits, compared to mine. Wow that is strong! This is what can be so scary!  We can really believe that how we act, how we function, what our strengths are is the way it should be. 


*******************************************************************************************

What is unbelievably awesome is to allow God to let you each lean into the strength of the other.

*******************************************************************************************

 

            My husband is laid-back, easy going; he is always a 5 on a scale of 1-10. He rarely gets upset, he doesn't get angry, he is just right there in the middle. He is spontaneous, and will just go with the flow. Now, all of those qualities I found very delightful when we dated, but not so much after we married. I married a laid back, totally content guy and then expected him to become an A-type personality, that was a go-getter, make it happen type of guy. What in the world was I thinking?

 

 I spent so much time, convinced that he needed to be that kind of guy. I wasted time trying to change him, instead of seeing and accepting his strengths as just as significant as my strengths. Guess what my strengths are (go-getter, A-type, personality.) What I failed to see for so long was what can happen when you learn to see their strengths as equal to yours?

 

 Guess what it is powerful? A couple that recognizes, celebrates and leans into each other's strengths. My husband will never be a go-getter, but he may also live to be 100 years old, because he is not stressed, he is filled with grace and a sense of being present in the moment. I, on the other hand, may fall over any minute because I live many times with too much action, and too much stress. What is unbelievably awesome is to allow God to let you each lean into the strength of the other. What is better than enjoying two strengths that help balance and off-set each other's weaknesses. Praying we can find strength in the differences. 

 

~Carla 

3 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


No Regretz, No Regretz Grief in marriage help, No Regretz Marriage Coaching, No Regretz Marriage Podcast, No Regretz Premarital Counseling, No Regrtz Marriage Counseling, No Regretz Marriage mentoring, Marriage Counseling Marriage Coaching, Marriage Podcast, Premarital Counseling, Premarital Preparation, Grief in marriage, Marriage struggles, Help for struggling marriages, Marriage Retreats, Marriage mentoring, Marriage speakers, Marriage Conference, Virtual coaching, Marriage Coaching Georgia, Marriage Coaching near me, Marriage Coaching Southeast, Marriage Coaching Warner Robins GA, Marriage Coaching Athens, GA, Marriage Coaching Athens, Marriage Coaching Milledgeville, Marriage Coaching Milledgeville GA, Marriage Coaching Dublin, Marriage Coaching Dublin GA, Best Marriage Podcast, Marriage Coaching Podcast, Marriage Podcast Georgia, #1 Online Marriage Podcast, Premarital Counseling near me, Premarital Counseling Georgia, Premarital Counseling Warner Robins, Premarital Counseling Athens, Premarital Counseling Milledgeville, Premarital Counseling Dublin, Best Premarital Counseling, Best Online Premarital Counseling, Premarital Preparation near me, Premarital Preparation Georgia, Premarital Preparation Warner Robins, Premarital Preparation Athens, Premarital Preparation Dublin, Premarital Preparation Milledgeville, Grief in marriage help, Grief in marriage help near me, Grief in marriage help Georgia, Help for struggling marriages near me, Marriage Retreats near me, Marriage Retreats Georgia, Marriage Retreats Warner Robins, Marriage Retreats Athens, Marriage Retreats Dublin, Marriage Retreats Milledgeville, Best Marriage Retreats, #1 Marriage Retreats, Marriage mentoring near me, Marriage mentoring Georgia, Marriage mentoring Warner Robins, Marriage mentoring Athens, Marriage mentoring Milledgeville, Marriage mentoring Dublin, Online Marriage speakers, #1 Marriage speakers, Best online Marriage speakers, Marriage speakers Georgia, Marriage speakers Warner Robins, Marriage speakers Athens, Marriage speakers Milledgeville, Marriage speakers Dublin, Online Marriage Conference, Marriage Conference Georgia, Marriage coaching in Georgia, Relationship coaching in Georgia, Couples coaching in Georgia, Marriage counselor in Georgia, Marriage therapy in Georgia, Marriage counseling services in Georgia, Couples therapy in Georgia, Marriage coach near me in Georgia, Relationship counselor in Georgia, Marriage support in Georgia, Pre-marital coaching in Georgia, Marriage advice in Georgia, Communication coaching for couples in Georgia, Conflict resolution coaching in Georgia, Marriage enrichment programs in Georgia, Online marriage coaching in Georgia, Marriage retreats in Georgia, Marriage workshops in Georgia, Intimacy coaching for couples in Georgia, Marriage education in Georgia, Christian marriage coaching in Georgia, Marriage counseling for LGBTQ+ couples in Georgia, Marriage coaching for newlyweds in Georgia, Infidelity recovery coaching in Georgia, Emotional connection coaching for couples in Georgia, Marriage coaching for blended families in Georgia, Premarital counseling in Georgia, Marriage coaching for empty nesters in Georgia, Marriage crisis intervention in Georgia, Marriage coaching for military couples in Georgia, Marriage coaching for interracial couples in Georgia, Marriage coaching for long-distance couples in Georgia, Marriage coaching for second marriages in Georgia, Marriage coaching for busy couples in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with children in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with communication issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with trust issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with intimacy issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with financial challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with parenting conflicts in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with in-law issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with infidelity issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with addiction challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with blended family challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with religious differences in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with cultural differences in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with infertility issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with mental health challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with life transitions in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with career challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with retirement planning in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with aging parents in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with disability challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with grief and loss in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with trust and jealousy issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with low sexual desire in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with communication breakdown in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with boundary issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with codependency issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with anger management issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with emotional neglect in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with different love languages in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with addiction recovery in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with commitment issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with trauma history in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with attachment issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with sexual dysfunction in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with career-related stress in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with communication difficulties in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with financial disagreements in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with parenting challenges in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with in-law conflicts in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with intimacy struggles in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with trust and forgiveness issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with infertility concerns in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with mental health concerns in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with relocation stress in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with retirement adjustments in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with aging parent issues in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with disability adaptation in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with grief and bereavement in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with trust-building techniques in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with enhancing intimacy in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with communication improvement in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with conflict resolution skills in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with emotional connection strategies in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with effective parenting in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with building trust in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with fostering forgiveness in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with rekindling romance in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with rebuilding trust in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with enhancing communication in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with improving intimacy in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with strengthening relationships in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with fostering connection in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with resolving conflicts in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with rebuilding trust after infidelity in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with enhancing emotional intimacy in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with deepening emotional connection in Georgia, Marriage coaching for couples with improving relationship satisfaction in Georgia, 

Thanks for submitting!

Join Our Newsletter

Thanks for joining!

Copyright ©️ 2024 No Regretz Marriage

bottom of page